PROVIDENCE, RI — State Police confirmed Tuesday that a Providence-area man was pulled over and cited just over the Massachusetts border after authorities noticed his vehicle bore an “I Never Leave Rhode Island” bumper sticker despite being, incontrovertibly, not in Rhode Island.

According to officials, the man was stopped approximately 300 feet into Seekonk, a distance experts describe as “basically nothing” and the driver described as “still spiritually Providence.”

“He crossed state lines, yes,” said Trooper Mark Donnelly, gesturing vaguely toward the border. “But more importantly, he crossed the philosophical boundary established by that bumper sticker.”

The driver, who requested anonymity but later explained he was “only grabbing Market Basket because it’s cheaper and everyone knows that,” reportedly attempted to explain that Seekonk, Fall River, and Attleboro are “functionally Rhode Island suburbs that haven’t been annexed yet.”

“I wasn’t leaving Rhode Island,” the man said from the shoulder of Route 44. “I was temporarily occupying a Rhode Island-adjacent zone. This is still my routine. I’m still me.”

Police noted the man grew defensive when asked why his GPS was set to “Massachusetts.”

“That’s just how Google Maps labels it,” he said. “The algorithm doesn’t understand Rhode Island culture.”

Authorities issued a citation under Rhode Island Statute 38.2(b), which prohibits “performative state loyalty when contradicted by physical reality.” The fine includes a $75 penalty and mandatory removal of the bumper sticker until the driver completes a three-hour seminar titled So You Left Rhode Island: Processing the Guilt.

Witnesses say the man attempted to mitigate the situation by pointing out he still had a Del’s Lemonade sticker on the rear window and a Dunkin’ cup in the cup holder “from Cranston, not Massachusetts Dunkin’.”

“That should count for something,” he allegedly told officers.

The incident has reignited debate among Rhode Islanders about where the state truly ends. Many residents insist that Rhode Island extends “at least five miles into Massachusetts, depending on traffic and vibes.”

“I go to Target in Seekonk all the time,” said one East Side resident. “If that’s leaving Rhode Island, then the state was never real to begin with.”

At press time, the man had returned safely to Providence, where he immediately posted on social media that he “never leaves Rhode Island” and that the whole incident was “fake news pushed by Big Massachusetts.”